1. Spend Time Alone with Your Partner:
Healthy relationships are the result of hard work. Just like a garden, relationships need to be nurtured and fed. The marital relationship needs to be a top priority in a family. If a husband and wife focus all of their love, energy, and time on the children, they will find once the children are off to college that they are virtually strangers.

2. Date Night:
Date nights are recommended as a way to stay connected and nurture the relationship. Dates need not be extravagant or expensive. They could be a picnic on the beach, a quiet night home alone without the children or dinner at your favorite restaurant.

3. Best Relationships:
The best relationships are where each person in the relationship is an individual with their own identity. They have their separate likes and dislikes and can accept each other’s differences. They enjoy each others’ company, but value time apart where they do their “own thing”.

4. Vulnerability:
The ability to be vulnerable with your partner is vital to a good relationship. Vulnerability is the ability to share your innermost thoughts and dreams without fear of ridicule or consequences. It is being able to trust that your partner will take care of you in your time of need.

5. Communication:
Without clear communication, your relationship may suffer. Do you expect that if your partner loves you he/she should know what you need and want? Do you expect them to be able to read your mind? No one, no matter how much they love you, can read your mind. It is your responsibility to state your needs and wants in a way that your partner can hear. Often people are afraid to state their needs for fear of rejection or the feeling that they don’t deserve anything. Simply, they are afraid to be vulnerable.

Relationships go through cycles; there are good times and bad times in any relationship. Remembering the above rules may make the bad times less painful. Marriage counseling or premarital counseling can be helpful to sort out the issues and help improve communication. Often people, who seek help with their relationship, wait until the resentment and anger has built up, making counseling difficult if not impossible. If you find that you are having difficulty with your relationship, seek help before it is too late.

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